you get me, PBS

I spent ten minutes today
pretending like I could do yoga
as if halfheartedly following stretches
off of an ipad screen
really meant I was remembering to breath

then, I walked to the library
picked up a brochure I read once
and won't read again

when I came back
my yoga mat was still on the floor
I thought about stretching again
but decided to stay put

my tax dollars at work
(not that I've paid much tax lately)
for an hour long exposition on sausage
just pretentious enough
to absolve my sloth